Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Waiting to Bleed

It sounds like an album title.

Now I know that the 2WW is not as hard as waiting for your cycle to regulate after a miscarriage. At least with the 2WW, there is an end in sight. Right now, I have no idea whether I'll start bleeding tomorrow or in three months. Considering the miscarriage was so early, I thought that I would be back to a proper cycle quite fast. It has actually only been about a month so far, but it's the not knowing that is killing me.

Maybe if I'd celebrated the pregnancy, I would welcome the chance to mourn, but I feel as though the way things rolled out, all I want is to start trying again. Soon. The shitty part is, I've been PMS-ing and cramping and feeling like I'm going to bleed. For over a week. And nothing happens (this coming from a girl who had very few PMS symptoms before). I've even been wearing a pad or a liner the last few days, because I'm SO sure it's coming, and I get disappointed every time I go to the bathroom.

From what Dr. Google has told me, some women don't get their periods for months after a miscarriage, but that seems to be the case more for women who lose the pregnancies later in their first trimester. I have no idea what it's supposed to be for earlier losses. If any of you could weigh in with your experiences, I'd love to hear.

I just don't know what to do with myself in this forced time out! I miss TTC-ing. That's kind of crazy.

To help kill the time, I will watch one of my favourite YouTube videos to help with the mantra! (unfortunately, the embedding function is disabled, but if you like adorable kids, click here).

4 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear about your ups and downs with all this. But I know it will happen. Keep writing and keep positive.

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  2. thinking of you and sending healing thoughts! with one of my early miscarriages my period started within 10 days. For the other I did have to take the inducing drugs. but I think it was on its way without them, so I would avoid them if possible. take care.

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  3. Ugh. I hope this is over for you soon and you can try again!

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  4. Oh God...I hated that part of pregnancy. You know...honestly....all of pregnancy sucks. It's really really scary. I hated being pregnant. However, that being said, I promise..babies have a way of making you forget how awful this whole process is.

    Best of luck...I'll be checking back.

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