Friday, March 9, 2012

Adding insult to injury

It's been a tough couple of days. I'm 16 dpo / CD31 with a usual 27-day cycle. As I mentioned in my last post, we didn't bother going for a blood test on Wednesday morning after the negative HPT, just because I didn't feel like getting prodded and poked.

Big mistake.

I spent the majority of the day at work on Wednesday Googling negative HPTs on 14dpo that turn into positives. And there were a lot. All I could think about was that I'd peed 2 hours before I took the test and maybe my HcG levels were just too small to measure. I decided that I should probably stop dreaming and get back to work, and was completely preoccupied.

The next morning, yesterday, I also should have gone for a blood test, but it was a friend's funeral that day (I'm not going to go there here... it's been tough) and I felt I couldn't miss more work and the morning was slow.

Last night, I still hadn't got my period, so I took a HPT at 7:30. The faintest of faintest of lines showed up and Devon and I both agreed it looked like a positive test. There was one more test in the box, so we tested again. Another very, very faint positive.

We freaked out and didn't know what to do, so I sent Devon off to get a test that we could determine more easily. She came home with a digital one, which we tested with (same urine) and it flashed "not pregnant" at us. And then Dr. Google told us that digital tests aren't as good as line tests, so out went Devon again last night just before 10 to buy two more brands.

Negative and negative. And probably about $60 later.

Got up this morning and still no period. Tested negative. Went to the lab. Beta came back at lunch time with a level of 0. I still haven't got my period.

Next time, I'm going for the frikkin' blood test on the first day possible. Yesterday's funeral was SO hard, and then coming home and going through all of that was just ridiculous.

We got a cancellation appointment to see our RE on Tuesday, which is before I'd have to start my Clomid this month, so I'm happy.

We need a plan. In a big, bad way... we need a plan.

Yesterday was also my blog's second birthday. Two years of writing about TTC and I feel like things have hardly progressed at all.


10 comments:

  1. Ugh. How frustrating. Looking at your TTC timeline though you guys HAVE accomplished a lot in the past two years. You're closer to having your baby now then you were then. Try not to get discouraged.

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  2. Oh Lex I am so sorry this is happening to you and Devon. I am glad you have a doctor's appointment. There must be a plan as you say with steps to increase getting to a pregnancy. Maybe you need the big guns. I still believe this will happen and now your period is probably more psychological just because you are focusing on getting pregnant and your period is so related to moods. Let us know after your appointment.

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  3. Hey Lex
    wishing for all the best for you...
    reminds me of all the tears I shed over not being pregnant with late periods and negative test ( and kept repeating tests $$$ just like you ) only to FINALLY have positive results a week later. All three of my babies showed up so late on the pee tests.
    So, sending some positive vibes and prayer your way.
    Sorry it is such a stressful time.
    Linda

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  4. ttc is enough of an emotional roller coaster without other difficult to hand life events or late periods. glad you have the appt with the dr. sorry this week has been rough, hang in there.

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  5. Happy birthday on your blog! Even if it doesn't feel like you're making progress, you ARE. You've put your journey out there for others - that's huge. I believe good juju is coming your way!

    I'm sorry you're going through this. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, girl!

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  6. Lex, you have come along way no matter what you think at the moment you have had progress. I wish it wasn't so hard on you. I'm sorry :( I wish I could make it better for you and Devon . Sending you hope and strength.

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  7. Oh, what an emotional rollercoaster. Sending a big hug. ((()))

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  8. I'm sorry to read about all the ups and downs. Glad you'll get to see the RE sooner rather than later to make the plan that you want and need!

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  9. what a crappy end to a very sad day. I'm so sorry about your friend, and sorry again about your frustration--glad you get to see the dr soon and make a plan!

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