We are gearing up for an IUI this week and hopefully this girl will live up to the lesbian mom title in her blog name soon. It's getting a little tiring logging in to Blogger and seeing that I still only fit one of the three words that I've chosen to describe this space. Ah well. Let's hope this is it.
I've been able to do some de-stressing, though work isn't getting any easier though I am trying to focus on the good. Devon and I had some issues to deal with these past few weeks, which rarely happens, and I think didn't help the situation, but we've done some talking and worked through the issues and are on the right track.
How's that for vague. Oy. Really, it's nothing. Moving on...
I'm going to call our clinic to book an ultrasound for Monday morning (CD14) if I don't get a positive OPK tomorrow. I'm a bit torn: There is one day a month that Devon cannot get out of work (full board meeting) and that one day this month is Tuesday, which is probably when we will be doing the insem. It's tough - I always want us to be together for it, but it's just something she cannot get out of. I don't think I'd care as much as if it was our old clinic, but it's the first time going to a new one and within 5 minutes of meeting some stranger, I'm going to be naked from the waist down on a table with him/her in my cooch. I'm kind of nervous about it, but trying not to put much energy into it.
If we still don't test positive on Monday, I'll speak with my doctor about whether it looks as though we might make it 'til Wednesday afternoon (triggering Tues night if I haven't had a surge) but I'm guessing I'll be good to go before that and obviously don't want to risk missing ovulation.
If there is anything that has been the most challenging about this process is the lack of control. I am a planner and have a clear vision/idea of what the week/month is going to look like... so when I am a slave to my reproductive system and have no choice over the matter, it's really hard. I actually have an event at work on Tuesday afternoon and had to do something I absolutely hate doing: Ask for help. I told my boss I had an appointment but won't know which day until the morning of and there is no way I can get out of it. She's not happy, but she's agreed to cover, if needed. I just have to be okay with that kind of thing now, which is so not my personality.
I don't like the thought of doing the IUI alone this month, but I am happy that I'm back on the TTC wagon. Please send me some non-Tuesday vibes :)