Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Midwives, OBs and shrinks

I'm hoping that I can work with a midwife through this pregnancy,  but I'm not sure I'd be accepted based on my health history.

I called one of the very highly reviewed midwifery groups in town several days after our BFP. It took them a week to return my first phone call to ask me one question, which I answered when I called back (I was in a meeting when they called). That was more than a week and a half ago and I haven't heard back. I have followed up every two days. On Friday, I left a message saying "Could you let me know either way whether a midwife would be able to see me, because if it's a no, I'm going to have to look somewhere else." Nothing. No call back, no nothing. 

So, yesterday we started looking somewhere else and found something that really clicked. We submitted the intake form last night and I got a call today. Of course, because I'm "further into my pregnancy" (at 8 wks!) I may not be able to get the midwives that I requested (I asked for them because they said they work specifically with queer women), but I would be able to see someone. I will have an appointment set up by the end of this week. It is both a midwifery clinic and a program for new mom groups, yoga classes, prenatal classes, info sessions, workshops and a library. It sounds awesome.

If the midwives do choose not to work with me because of my preexisting condition, I'm hoping that they will refer me to an OBGYN, because I don't know where to start.

I still haven't heard back from my reproductive psychiatrist either. Because of the time that lapsed since I saw her last (due to how long it took to get pregnant), I had to get another referral, so have to go through the process again. I really need her guidance on all my meds right now. Although what I'm currently taking is working for my heath, and she's happy with the levels I'm on for baby's health, it's one thing talking with her about "in theory" and another "in reality". It's now my reality and I need some help.

In all honesty, I'm feeling kind of unprepared and unsupported in the healthcare sense of all of this. I don't like my family doctor and don't plan to use her through this pregnancy, so it's just me and Devon right now. I see my regular psychiatrist every two weeks, which is awesome, but he's a bit clueless on the reproductive front. My naturopath is great too, but says stuff that I don't really agree with and am not comfortable doing (have some raw beef! raw eggs are great too!).

Essentially, I don't feel like I have a team backing me up yet. I need a team. Even if nobody sees me until the second trimester... I just need to know that I won't be alone through all of this. (We also haven't found a place to live yet, so I'm feeling extra unsettled).

I love Canada and its public healthcare system, but there are some downfalls to always needing referrals and the ridiculous waitlists involved. I do, however, have an appointment on June 15th to go over the ultrasound report with my RE, so if worst comes to worst, I'll ask him for a referral to an OB and start from there.

I imagine the clinic would have booked that ultrasound follow-up appointment sooner if they'd found something wrong???


  1. This post bothers me. I would never go back to a doctor I didn't hear from within 24 hours. I worked for doctors most of my adult life and we always called back within hours. I am sorry you don't feel you have a team. Just stick with your current doctor until you find a new one. Also, call the ultrasound place and ask for a copy of your report. Here in the US you can get results in a few hours or a couple of days if nothing is wrong. Also, in your situation with different drugs and a history of mental issues it should be imperative that you see someone more frequently. You and Devon must be your own advocate as I am sure you know. Keep insisting on gettting "your people" and your team together. I wished you lived here.

    1. I agree - time to find another doctor! You'll get your dream team together soon; in the meantime, just take care of yourself and try to NOT be stressed out. (I know, I know, easier said than done!)

  2. Your PCP should be able to refer you to an OB. Also, persist with the midwives. We had to call a number of clinics the first time around, but eventually got in with one we loved. This time we had to harass them to take us again. I have a friend who started out with an OB because she couldn't get in with a midwife, but then found one part way through and transferred her care. Not sure if this is a possibility either, but you might be able to receive shared care rather than having to see only an OB. Hope that helps!

  3. I would definitely try to find a good OB as "back-up." If you're having trouble finding a midwife, perhaps you can also talk to some doulas and see if they have recommendations? A doula would be a good person to have on your team as well.

    We started out with our RE, went to the regular OB, and then switched to a midwife at 30 weeks (but we had given them an earlier heads up).

  4. that place does sound awesome. i love one-stop-shops. and wtf is up with the medical community dissing all of us with above average needs? i am totally with you on the "i need a team". so. do. i. lets hope everyone steps up their game and we both get the care we're craving very soon. feel good lex!