Monday, August 27, 2012

Halfway there!

Tomorrow marks the halfway point of this pregnancy.

I've been able to keep this feeling of knowing that BoomBoom is healthy and I've managed to since the ultrasound. It may not sound like much of a feat, but there hasn't been many 4-day stretches where I haven't doubted something, so I'm pretty happy.

I picked up a journal and started to write to the baby, which I think will help me get my thoughts out so I can remember this time and also help me to connect to BoomBoom a little more. I just keep scanning ahead 18 or 19 years, trying to picture my daughter reading through it. What will she think of me?

We are struggling a little with names - we thought it would be easier knowing the sex, but now we're able to get more focused, the names that we once loved don't fit. We do have a #1 girls name, which we absolutely adore, but it's been a bit of a turn-off lately because three acquaintances in the last three years have used the name for their daughters. It's becoming more popular (bottom of the top 20 in Canada), but I can't tell yet if it's going to be the next Jennifer or Lisa. But nothing else has fit as well.  I guess we have to be okay with the potential of our daughter being a first-name-last-initial kid in her class. Maybe. We have a few months yet. We are using a version of Devon's (deceased) mom's name as the middle name and will be using my last name. I've tried to get Devon to take my name so that we can all have one family name, but she struggles with that, as most of her family is dead and she feels as though she's one of the last of her kind. Her last name is very unique and we haven't found another non-relative in Canada with the same last name.

Physically, I'm struggling a bit and I'm a little scared that at 20 weeks, I'm this uncomfortable already. I've been putting off making an appointment with an RMT (mostly just for time), but I need to get there ASAP. At the end of the day, my upper ribs feel extremely bruised and sometimes almost broken. I thought it was the underwire of my bra, so switched to a sports bra last week, and haven't felt the relief I was hoping for. There are days where I'm still cramping quite a bit and I tire incredibly easily. I was home early from work today with a migraine, which comes and goes. I'm normally a very physically healthy person, so feeling each twinge and pain that I can't shrug off kind of sucks. I can't imagine getting any bigger, but ha! Of course I'm going to be a lot bigger than this.

To some of the Blogger bloggers out there, I've had trouble commenting on your blogs as of late. Not sure what's going on, but hopefully it'll get fixed soon. Take care.


  1. I hear you on the size thing. I already feel enormous and can't imagine getting bigger, but it's bound to happen.
    I was getting headaches too, but they've eased up. Drink lots of water!
    (P.S. We like some of the bottom of the top 20 names too. It's hard to decide though! Still no agreement over here even though Jen does like one of my original favourite names... now I'm just not so sure. :/)

  2. Yay for halfway! We're pretty sure we ended up with a "Jennifer" even though we didn't mean to which is okay, because I know some truly awesome Jennifers (and Heathers and so on...) In the States we seems to be having a resurgence of names that I think of as our grandmothers' names. While it means that we have a new generation of fantastic Jennifers, it also means we're getting to honor that generation. As for the last name, we gave our daughter a hyphenated name that was both mine and my partner's. I admit that could cause her trouble in life, but since neither my wife or I want to change our names, the hyphenated combo means that either of us is easily the parent (important in the unenlightened eyes of our state) and she has a bit of us both. Good luck with the naming conundrum. It's sort of fun in a whole "imagine the possibilities!" way.

  3. Lex, it pains me to hear you are still struggling. I only wish you could relax, walk for exercise and breathe. Do you think upping your meds might help now that you are past the danger point? This can be such a happy time. Focus on the positive. You are having the baby you have longed for. All is well. Breathe and try to enjoy.

  4. Oh my gosh...we share a lot of the same feelings and experiences. I guess because we're going through this journey at the same time.

    My choice for a baby girl name is also at the bottom of the Top 20 here in Canada...I'm worried it'll become more and more popular by the time she's born and I don't want that for her! But many, many years ago I had a dream that I had a daughter by this name and I'M STICKING WITH IT no matter what! I feel like it was her name before she was even a twinkle in my eye.

    I've been keeping a pregnancy journal, too. And I also wonder what my daughter will think of me when she reads it. I so wish my mom had kept a pregnancy journal during her pregnancy with me. I hope our daughters will appreciate our thoughts and feelings when they were in utero.

    Are you in Toronto or is that private info for the blog?

    Oh and I truly think pregnancy SUCKS physically. I've never been fatter or more uncomfortable and it's NOT all baby. Sigh. It'll all be worth it in the end.

  5. Half way?! This is so exciting. I think for Fern she started to get really uncomfortable around now but it didn't necessarily get worse with every week. It ebbed and flowed a little.

    We had a hard time with the popular name thing and vetoed a lot of our old favorites because of rising popularity. No matter how common the name is, it just matters that you love it!

  6. Ugh, names are SO HARD. I thought it would be easier once we knew the sex, but it's not. It's gotten to the point where I've stopped telling friends my prospective names, because everyone inevitably has something judgmental to say. We've decided we're just going to keep a list of the names we really like, and then figure out which one fits her after she's born.

    It's awfully hard to name someone you haven't even met yet!

    Are you planning to post pictures of her after she's born? I know you're really private... but we'd love to see her little face! :)