I just spent a lovely evening with my best friend, looking after her sister's five-month-old twins. One boy, one girl. Perfect. One shot and bam! - instant family.
I'm sure every reader who has twins or multiples is saying "oh god it's not that simple". And no, just having to change the boy's diaper while keeping an eye on the girl while my friend was in the washroom - I cannot imagine what it would be like to raise two babies at once. Two times the madness... but two times the love as well. Even two nipples ain't going to make the job that easy.
The babies are so different from each other. Physically, the girl looks like mum and the boy looks like dad. The boy giggles and smiles and dances and the girl is low-key, relaxed, a little less emotive and holy crap she's pudgy! They were actually a C-section just because the girl was almost 3 pounds bigger than the boy in the womb, and stealing all his nutrients. Hopefully (or not), she'll grow into her cheeks.
It made me think about the odds when couples are TTC. With the hormones, the potential meds, the clinical aspect, cleaning sperm so only the goodies can swim, making it the perfect place for conception. A lot of the moms I've read blog of have multiples. Does anyone know what the stats are? For any fertility treatments? IVF? Good ol' shoot 'em up turkey baster style?
Makes me think that the odds would be higher when I try to conceive. Can a woman who struggles with mental health, low energy, and pain really take care of two babies, let alone one? But the cards will fall where they fall, and I imagine that if it were meant to be that I somehow conceived twins or triplets, I'd just have to fucking figure it out like everyone else who is in the same boat does.
These twins tonight were so good and well behaved. The boy cried for about 30 seconds after I put him to bed. Everything was so easy... and then I thought about the other 21 hours of the day. What does mum have to go through to keep herself sane?
That's when I'm grateful I would have a supportive family nearby if I am going to have a baby. I don't know whether I could go forward on this journey without my mum around. I just wish she hadn't recently moved a ferry ride away.
Oh well, there's time. Perhaps too much time. Especially as I set the clock back tonight.
The odds are typically higher for IVF because they transfer more than one embryo just in case. Most IVF vets that I know do have twins because of this, but if your embryos look good, you can just transfer one.
ReplyDeleteGood to know... I guess considering how expensive IVF is, the "just in case" is worth it.
ReplyDeleteI am finally having a moment to back read your blog. I found it through babycenter.ca. Twins are a bit of a boggle for pre-pregnancy I think. I know you're pregnant now, and I don't think it is twins from your blog, I don't know if you used IFV or IUI yet.
ReplyDeleteJust a note though, I had twins on the brain before too, and a little still.
Thank you for your post. It's good to know I'm not the only one that had slight anxiety about the possibility of having twins.
http://samwip.blogspot.ca/2012/08/113-twins-on-brain-081612.html
That is my blog post about twins on the brain if you're interested.